“I’d give my [explicit body part] to play professional baseball.”

We’ve heard the bold declaration-cum-cliché many times. Perhaps we’ve said it ourselves.

The pitchers on the above list—by some combination of appearance, performance and animal ferocity—put that statement to the test.

One false movement against an Aroldis Chapman fastball, and one might discover they’ve made just such a bargain. Explicit body parts don’t fare well against objects moving at 105 miles per hour.

Little, white…ahem…objects.

So before you go dealing with the devil for a chance at the big time, consider the menace a big-league hitter faces when he digs into the batter’s box.

In particular, consider the varying shades of nasty represented by the six men above.

If you’d still give your body parts for a date with these gentlemen, I applaud you. If you wouldn’t, then perhaps this isn’t the platitude for you.

BONUS:

Because I’m a whore for your approval and a compulsive list maker, I’ve included a list of honorable mentions. They are:

Roy Halladay, Felix Hernandez, Tim Lincecum, Brian Wilson, Carlos Zambrano (invoking the craziness clause), Josh Beckett

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