Super Bowl Blues: A 10-Step Sporting Guide to Cure Your NFL Withdrawal

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Super Bowl Blues: A 10-Step Sporting Guide to Cure Your NFL Withdrawal
Rob Carr/Getty Images

The last remnants of cheese dip have completely dissolved into the couch, the keg shell has made it back to the store, and the guy living on your futon since game-day has finally found his way home.

You’ve debated every aspect of the big game with anyone at the office water cooler willing to listen. 

Lately, no one is willing. Sophie from accounting is buying bottled water to avoid you altogether. 

"Did you see the commercial with the talking baby, and the ape driving the—"

“Yes, we've talked about it, several times," Sophie cuts you off noticeably perturbed. 

The harsh reality is beginning to set in—football is over and there is no addiction patch in sight. 

You find yourself wandering the streets with your La-Z-Boy on rollers and bowl of pretzels in hand, looking for any football you can find. Even fourth-graders playing pick up games on the street are starting to get your attention. 

Your wife got word the season was over once Giselle commented on the game and expects your return on Sundays. Calls like “Wes Welker over the middle,” will now be replaced by “Do these jeans make me look fat?”

Soon, you'll be visiting every Crabree & Evelyn within a 100 mile radius. 

You need help. 

If you think you can get by watching regular season NBA games, you are probably someone who would find enjoyment watching two sloths play chess.  I've done studies. Completely equal entertainment value. 

The Jeremy Lin excitement has been like a band-aid for a broken femur, but now the training wheels are off and you have to find a way to guide your rickety Schwinn all the way until March Madness, when sports return to normalcy. 

So what now? 

Help is here. 

This list of sporting excellence I've conjured up should keep your attention and if correctly followed, Dick Vitale should be knocking at your door before you know it. 

These events can be followed every year, so feel free to tuck this one away for next season as well. 

Unless perhaps you already bought a frequent buyer's card to Bed, Bath & Beyond? 

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