Hottest Sports Stories for Monday, Jan. 9

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Hottest Sports Stories for Monday, Jan. 9
Doug Pensinger/Getty Images

And lo, the one they call He would rise up after three horrible games to smite the Steelers, and America would thus lose their goddamn minds.  

Welcome to the Daily Radar, the one place that will greet you with a guaranteed hello.  Leave your comments in the place marked "Comments."

Let's dish. 

In this edition:

 

SEAN SALISBURY FIRED FROM GREATEST JOB EVER

Sean Salisbury was relieved as Lingerie Football League color analyst on Monday. Well, he was fired, not relieved. I imagine he was quite pissed actually. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: What happened?

Our Take: Darren Rovell tweets this mysterious post. 

Now we would assume that he must have done something tawdry. Rovell nips that in the bud with his next tweet that issues, "Sean Salisbury's dismissal as a Lingerie League broadcaster was not related to any sort of inappropriate behavior." Well, he is just unlucky I guess. 

Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 But, I Don't Want To Leaves

Imagine having a job where you look at boobs all day and are forced to talk about it. Yes, Salisbury is pretty much the saddest man on earth right now. 

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TEBOW NEARLY BREAKS TWITTER, NFL RECORD STILL SAFE 

Jeff Gross/Getty Images

I told you that the world lost its collective mind. You all nearly broke Twitter, something that I had no idea could be broken. And you did so with a Tim Tebow hammer. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: How popular was he on Twitter. 

Our Take: Here is a tweet which I shall refer to as an Official Statement that the Nation is Indeed Nuts.

Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 Tweets

The real crime is that after a huge game, Tebow went back and curled up with a nice bible. You are going to kick yourself in ten years when girls don't give you the time of day. Just ask Matt Leinart. 

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LSU AND ALABAMA USE ACTION MOVIES TO GET PSYCHED

Kevin Winter/Getty Images

It makes sense that LSU would watch Contraband and Alabama would watch Red Tails to get ready for Monday night's BCS title game. Those movies feature hitting and things going boom, and they play football by hitting people and making things go boom. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Couldn't they have picked good movies?

Our Take: When I think of an action movie that just needs to get the adrenaline flowing, I immediately turn to Mean Girls. All the backstabbing and lying going on between Lindsay Lohan and Rachel McAdams puts me in a foul mood. 

Hype Meter: 4 out of 5 Calms Before The Storm

The time for film watching is over. We need to get this game going, if for no other reason than to stop hyping it up. We have talked about it for so long that there is almost too much hype going into it. 

Deeper Dive

Alabama and LSU Have Movie Nights (Sportsgrid)

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DUSTIN PENNER GETS PANCAKED

Bruce Bennett/Getty Images

Injuries are serious business, unless you are Los Angeles Kings forward Dustin Penner. He injured himself sitting down to eat pancakes. You can't make this stuff up.

Question on Everybody's Mind: This guy is an athlete right?

Our Take: Speaking as someone who is a non-athlete, I can say that sitting in a chair to munch on some delicious pancakes isn't as easy as it sounds. There is an art form to sitting down properly, and Penner forgot it in this instance. 

Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 Bottles of Aunt Jemima

There really is nowhere else to go with this. It's so outlandish on its own that to keep talking about it would be overkill. 

Deeper Dive

Dustin Penner Is The Missing Link (LA Kings Insider)

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DARNELL DOCKETT LAUGHS IN ROGER GOODELL'S FACE

Courtesy of Twitter

The Arizona Cardinals disappointed this season, but don't tell that to Darnell Dockett. He apparently likes to play with big guns. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Why the big gun?

Our Take: Well, when you are hunting coyotes in the Arizona desert, you have to be able to stand far away and shoot them or else the road runner will see you and drop a piano on your head. 

Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 Reasons Dockett Is Cooler Than Me

Because playing defensive end in the NFL doesn't prove how hard you are, you have to be able to talk softly and carry a big frickin' gun. 

Deeper Dive

Darnell Dockett Shows Us His (Black Sports Online)

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TIM TEBOW GETS IMMORTALIZED YET AGAIN

Jeff Gross/Getty Images

The first thing that went through my mind when Tebow threw that game-winning touchdown pass in Sunday's game was "I wonder where I can get a Tebow Tecmo Bowl t-shirt?" Well, glad you asked. You can get them here

Question on Everybody's Mind: Should I get this one or wait for the Super Tecmo Bowl shirt?

Courtesy of TecmoBowl.org

Our Take: Since we all know that the Broncos are going to win the Super Bowl, why waste money on a shirt that will be outdated in four weeks? Plus, I am sure that they will have some sort of package deal for all of their Tebow shirts. 

Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 Ways That Prove Tebow Is The Best QB Ever

I don't see Aaron Rodgers, Tom Brady or Drew Brees getting their own specially made Tecmo Bowl t-shirt, which can only mean that Tebow is the best player in the NFL. 

Deeper Dive

Tebow Relished Underdog Role (B/R)

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SO, THAT SECOND COMING HAPPENED

Jeff Gross/Getty Images

There really is no sense in playing that Super Bowl you were all planning. Tim Tebow has the NFL on lockdown after torching the Steelers. Funny, I thought Tebow rested on Sunday. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Are you a Tebow-liever?

Tim Tebow makes you feel...

Submit Vote vote to see results

Our Take: I am Tebow Agnostic. While I give him the mad, dope props, I am not about to build churches to him like Skip Bayless. I am a little scared about Tebow eerily passing for 316 yards though. Oh, and he did that on 10 completions. Were the Steelers defenders on quaaludes? 

Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 Nucking Futs

This is pretty much the biggest story in the NFL in the past season. I was about to say of all-time, but the actual invention of the game edges Tebow Mania by a nose. Who say's nice guys don't finish first on the national landscape of what we overhype?

Again, this is not a knock on Tebow, but the silly, unbelievably-ludicrous hype that is not warranted nor deserved. 

Jesus H. Tebow, It Was A Freaking Wild Card Game Tweet Award: 

Deeper Dive: 

Tim Tebow: Why Tim Terrific's Magic Is Sure to Run Out Next Weekend (B/R)

Denver Tebows Humiliate Pittsburgh Steelers (Denver Post)

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MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL

Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images

It's time to saddle up for a wild ride of field goals and quarterbacks throwing away passes to the sidelines. Yup, it's the BCS National Championship Game. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Who will win?

Most exciting part of BCS game will be...

Submit Vote vote to see results

Our Take: How about this, we will all lose. Get ready for a game that, at best, will feature one touchdown. The BCS title game between Alabama and LSU will be like a lecture given by Ben Stein.

Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 Defense Wins Championships

Oh, there is also the added bonus of potential controversy here. LSU fans may spontaneously combust if Alabama, a team they beat, are the one's holding the national title.  

Deeper Dive: 

BCS Championship Is Dream Matchup for Football Purists (B/R)

Final Thoughts on BCS Title Game (SI.com)

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MANCHESTER STILL UNITED'S

Alex Livesey/Getty Images

FA Cup action was in full swing this weekend which means about 10 of you cared. We will get back to Tebow coverage shortly so bear with me. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Does Manchester still belong to United?

Our Take: This weekend's FA Cup proved Manchester City can spend all the money in the world, but key players like Wayne Rooney and tenuous officiating will always make this a Red Devils' world. 

Hype Meter: 4 out of 5 What's a Wayne Rooneys?

This really should be a bigger story than it is. Alas, any news story will now be overshadowed by that Tim Tebow guy. Maybe I wouldn't feel that way if I didn't have so many of his posters up. 

Deeper Dive: 

Wayne Rooney Video: Watch Man U Star Make Sick Penalty Kick Header (B/R)

Manchester Derby Red-Card Rumble (The Independent) 

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NFL CASE OF THE MONDAYS

All the football news that doesn't pertain to God's grandson. 

Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images

SAINTS GO MARCHING 

The Lions tried their best to hold a good man down. Instead, Drew Brees and the Saints were rolling. Brees threw for 45 miles and 73 touchdowns and will now face the 49ers. 

COLD AS ICE 

Matt Ryan went up against the Giants defense and proceeded to choke for four quarters. Why paramedics were never called I have no idea. Eli Manning and the G-Men take on the Packers. Uh-Oh. 

TEXANS HUMOR BENGALS 

Andy Dalton wet the bed as the Texans bullied him and the Bengals all game. Cincinnati gets to go back home to lick their wounds and the Texans get the chance to lose to the Ravens.  

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DAILY FUN WITH MOVING PICTURES 

Because what else are you going to watch at work?

SHOT HEARD ROUND BIG BLUE NATION

Here is video of the freshman that drained a half-court shot for $10,000, only to be told he didn't win. After a Twitter uproar, he got paid. Long live 140 characters or less. 

Deeper Dive: Freshman Wins $10,000 on Half-Court Shot Thanks to Protest

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LACES OUT 

MLB hardballer Jack Wilson proves he can kick as well as Matt Prater in this trick shot video. 

Deeper Dive: Watch MLB Star Kick Football to Jet Skier in Stride

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CHUCK CLOWNS SHAQ

There is no former athlete funnier than Chuck, period. 

Deeper Dive: Watch Sir Charles Mock His 'Inside the NBA' Co-Stars (B/R)

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WTF VIDEO OF THE DAY 

Here is video of an acrobat on a unicycle. Not enough? Well, watch her flip plates on her head using just her foot. Yeah, now you are interested, smarty pants. 

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BLAKE GRIFFIN PUTS BALL IN HOOP 

The Clip Show gets dunktastic. 

Deeper Dive: Watch Clippers Star Dunk in Ersan Ilyasova's Face (B/R)

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BRO-NCO BRO HUG FEST

Watch John Elway and Jon Fox feel obligated to hug Tim Tebow. 

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BITS OF TID 

Little bits of goodness with a chewy center. 

ROCK, CHALK, ARE YOU SERIOUS?

I love tradition just as much as the next guy, but they are taking things a bit too seriously over there in Kansas. Via The Wichita Eagle.

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NIKE GIVES GREAT DRAGON

Nike is honoring the Chinese Year of the Dragon with four sick versions of classic shoes, but now with more dragon. Via The Hoops Doctors.

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SOUNDS GOOD TO ME

Here is a rundown of Gina Carano training photos. Why? Because she is hot. Via BroBible.

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DAILY DESSERT    

Until tomorrow, study hard. 

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